Being Brave

This week we got our adoption profile sent to the closest office to our new home. We are just waiting now for our new caseworker to contact us to complete the new home study. We are lucky that the agency has let us stay online during our temporary stay in Salt Lake,  we just knew that if there was an adoption opportunity we would have to get a home study completed super quick.
What no one knew is that I was secretly really glad that I had an excuse to not promote our adoption for a little while. I had had so much fun blogging and facebooking and thinking of new ways that we could get our names out there before. We worked really hard and got a lot of good feedback quickly.
After the failed placement we all know that I have struggled with how to heal from that experience and I didn't realize that I was scared to try again. Well... I'm scared. I know that the same type of experience can happen again. The sweet women that consider adoption for their babies are going through something so incredibly hard. They have the right to change their mind, that baby is theirs until the papers are signed.
So now I have to be brave.
I have to accept how hard this was for us and let it make me stronger. I have to be positive about the life I have and have hope for the future. I have to work harder than before to get what we so desperately want. I have to truly realize that I may not get what I think I deserve or that it may take a very long time. I have to get creative. I want to learn from and help others who have had this experience. I have to heal.
So it starts again. Will you help us? Will you do what I know many of you have done before? Will you take our pass along cards? Will you talk to everyone you know about it? Will you blog it and FB it? We can't do this without your help! Please share our story and help us find our baby.
We are ready again. We are so ready.